Our First Specialist Appointment

As I drove home after that OB appointment, I was extremely upset. Anthony had left work and was home shortly after me. Again, I explained to him what the doctor had told me. My OB told me that if my husband wanted to call her and talk to her, to please do so. He spoke to her and she explained everything to him the way she explained it to me. We then told our families what had happened, asked for prayers, and told them they could tell whoever they wanted so they could also pray. Our baby girl needed all the prayers she could get. We had a long weekend ahead of us before we were to see the specialist. We prayed together that evening and continued to believe our little girl was going to be okay, and that she would start growing again.

Tuesday came around and Anthony, my mom and I finally pulled up at the office of Maternal Fetal Medicine. We were confident everything was going to go well. We were all taken to the back, I was weighed, had my blood pressure taken and was asked a few questions. This was the first time we had heard the term “intrauterine growth restriction.” It was also the first time that we were told something might be wrong with Gabriella’s intestines, and they would just have to see what the ultrasound looked like. We went in the room and I laid down in the chair. The technician began the ultrasound and started plugging in Gabriella’s measurements. The specialist walked in shortly after. He started asking us questions about our family history as he was looking at the ultrasound. It didn’t seem like he looked at it for very long at all. Finally, he said something along the line of my amniotic fluid being very low and our baby being very small. He continued by telling us that she was measuring two weeks behind, that this was very serious and our baby was at risk for stillbirth. He wanted us to go straight to my OB’s office to get some blood work drawn to test for anything genetic or viral. He also said our baby needed to be checked twice a week, and that in three weeks they would take her measurements again to see if she had grown at all. He told me to rest as much as possible, drink more water, and then just like that, he was gone.

The room was silent as I wiped off the ultrasound gel. It’s hard for me to explain my feelings in this moment. That appointment had not gone as we had hoped. Our hearts were crushed as our worst fears were confirmed. I was scared and worried for our baby girl, and angry at how nonchalant the specialist seemed to act. Certainly, he was right and we needed to hear how serious this was, but the way he communicated this information just didn’t sit well with us. On the other hand, I know I’m a very sensitive person and we were in a very vulnerable situation. I’m sure there are women out there that would love this doctor and that could handle his frankness, but he was not our cup of tea. Some doctor-patient relationships just don’t mesh, and we now believe that’s all this was.

Anthony, my mom and I went straight to my OB’s office, and she explained to us further what the specialist had said. I’m so glad they were with me because it was extremely hard for me to focus and ask questions at this appointment and the appointments to come. I honestly don’t even know what my thoughts were, it was almost like I was in another world. I’m sure I was in shock. My OB explained any questions we had and told me to rest as much as possible, to drink high-calorie protein shakes at every meal, and to drink a lot more water. She also had the results to my glucose test and those results were normal. I had my blood drawn for the other tests and we left her office. On the ride home, we talked about how we still believed she was going to grow in these next three weeks, and how everything was going to be fine. We re-centered our faith and trust in God, and knew that no matter what the upcoming weeks would hold, God would protect her.